5 Miles of Hell!
Monday, May 9, 2016 at 2:30PM
Yes, there truly is a trail that has been given this name. It is outside of Green River, Utah. I had heard of it from a couple of riders and figured since I was going to meet a few buddies in Moab, Utah I might as well swing by and check it out.
This area has some spectacular rock formations because of the upheaval in the earth’s crust over the past umpteen million years! It has also provided some very challenging terrain to test a dirt bike riders’ skills. One of those test area has been named “5 Miles of Hell” and marked with patches of white paint so a rider can follow without getting lost and riding off into an abyss.
Another thing the paint does is make it very easy to find the established route while he or she is tired! Believe me when I tell you that you are going to get tired. It took me somewhere in the neighborhood of 3 hours to cover the difficult section which turned out to be closer to 7 miles!
Only one tip over when I failed to make a climb that resulted in a skinned up forearm, then a few wrenches were necessary to loosen the throttle assembly and bark buster so my throttle would turn freely.
While blazing along at a whopping 2.3 miles an hour I met a couple of riders on the trail that were from Colorado. Scott and John who were riding 250 & 300 2 stroke off road bikes, smart boys! Or should I say smart men! I stopped to chat with them and discovered they were 68 and 67 years old respectively. These guys became my heroes instantly! To be out tackling that trail at that age showed a lot of skill, determination and courage! I was apprehensive and I am a full ten years younger. I want to be like them in ten years!
After our chat we rode on and became a group of three which was fine by me cause now I had someone to call 911 for me! We soldiered on until we came to a wall I was told by my new riding partners was known as “The Crux”. Holy smokers, I was wondering how other riders go up this but thought if others can get up it so can we. So we parked our bikes and walked up for a closer look and to plot our intended route. There were several options but we settled on what appeared to be the safest but included turning our bikes around by hand at one point to have a better shot at making it. It worked perfectly with none of us crashing and breaking anything or injuring ourselves.
When we finally got to the top of the Crux we stopped and noticed a tree decorated with several remnants of others attempts at the Crux. There were broken brake and clutch levers, a radiator louver, a bent up radiator guard that obviously didn’t work well enough and a twisted and busted up radiator! Oh and a couple of left over radiator shrouds that had been ripped from the bikes. We may have been overly cautious but none of us was ordering parts.
Right after we conquered the Crux we came to a marker on the trail that was marked as a bail out point from 5 Miles of Hell leading back to Lone Man trail. A short break and discussion and it was decided that Scott and John would take the bail out as John was having a problem with cramps in his hands. So we said our good byes and I was off on my own again to see what the rest of the trail had to offer.
As it turned out more of the same without the “Crux”, but plenty of substitutes to keep me guessing as to whether or not I would survive this ordeal. It seemed every few hundred yards there would be some sort of stair step climb, a crevasse to scale or a decent into an area I just hoped I could get back up out of. I stopped once to take a picture and wondered how in the hell did someone figure out what path to take, then it dawned on me. Stupid, just looking at the surroundings and I realized it was usually the path of least resistance. That was sort of scary!
I finally got through the difficult stuff and found the end of the trail with a sign designating it as “5 MOH”. I was so proud of myself I signed in the book, as #33 of course, and then took Lone Man trail back to the truck. Funny how those 2-foot-deep whoops on the return trail didn’t seem very difficult!
If you think you need to challenge yourself, give me a call. I will tell you how to find 5-MOH!!! You didn’t really think I was going to offer to go with you did you!
#33
“Make your life a mission, not an intermission”
Reader Comments (2)
Sounds insane!!...would love to try it one day!...nice to hear you got out unscarred!😊
Love the parting line....."Make you life a Mission ,not an Intermission."